The Dark Hours

“Rejoice with those who rejoice, mourn with those who mourn.”  - Romans 12:15

As I write, I mourn with a family who has just lost a loved young man far, far too early under tragic circumstances. My heart breaks with a family who has had yet another pregnancy loss in a sea of long years of infertility. My gut twists as I learn sinking news from a family in our church community, that the outcome of a crucial surgery wasn't what we prayed and believed for.

What words do we offer in the dark hours? What do we say that doesn't cheapen the depth of hurt, discouragement, even despair? How do we acknowledge that this – all of this pain and fear and grief and disappointment – feels like crashing waves or, perhaps more accurately, a treacherous undertow? 

Why do we sometimes leap to offer bright and cheery, sunshiny words to people in deep suffering? The truth is, those cheery words are much more for ourselves than for the person who is suffering. We try and find something to say that allows US to feel less helpless, or to make sense of something senseless. We feel we have to say something to ease the suffering of another person. In fact, when we really amp up the “positive,” our efforts often have the opposite effect because they can make people feel guilty for not having the right mindset, not having enough faith, not being able to see the sunny side…

When the truth is, even for followers of Christ, there are dark hours. There are hours when we feel despair and don’t know if we can go on. There are hours when, like our Saviour, our soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Can we accept that? What do we do with that kind of darkness?

Contrary to the the phrase that is often said to people who are suffering, scripture never promises that “God will not give us more than we can handle.” Nowhere in the Bible does it say that we will not find ourselves in circumstances that are more than we can bear. The verse often used to back up this platitude is 1 Corinthians 10:13 – which actually refers to our ability to resist temptation, not to our ability to withstand suffering.

One of my favourite authors wrote: “It’s not true that God never gives us more than we can handle. It’s ALWAYS more than we can handle. That’s the point.” And that really, really IS the point! The point is, there are many things in life that are just too much for us to bear alone. That’s why we aren't meant to travel alone. We need God and we need one another to bear it all.

In 12-step recovery support groups, the word ‘HOPE’ is often used as an acronym for Hearing Other People’s Experiences. We become HOPE to one another. It is people who have suffered and come through that are able to share their story and allow us to see that although life hurts and we bear scars… somehow there is a way through. When God seems far away and shrouded by clouds and we are in a deep, dark pit… In these dark hours, we need someone to believe in God’s goodness for us, when we may not be able to feel it or see it for ourselves. And we experience God’s goodness to us through the love and care and comfort of other people.

Often, in our dark hours, comfort does not come in the form of cheery words and promises. Sometimes comfort just crawls into our hole with us and holds our hand... so we know we're not in the hole alone. Sometimes the deepest comfort we can receive is to have someone else join our prayer for help. 

In the upside-down Kingdom of God, we find that (despite what we may have been led to believe from a very young age) we don’t need to run from these dark hours. That, in fact, God can meet us in these hours, right there in the dirt and the darkness. That, actually, unbelievably, there’s something HOLY about these dark hours – if we are willing to be fully present, listen, breathe…

“Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.” ~ Matthew 5:4

Arlene M.

Thankful In Trials

We are guaranteed two things in life – death and change.

With change also come trials… I have one to share with you. My hope is that you embrace your hardships as opportunities to get closer to Jesus.

Months ago, we took a four month vacation abroad. We decided to purchase a vehicle while away. (We were travelling to a country dealing in Euros.) We deposited our funds at the bank, then the next day we discovered an error was made in the exchange rate. The bank was advised of said error and the branch acknowledged their mistake and advised it would be rectified quickly. 

The day before the vehicle pickup, we found out from the bank that not only was the error unresolved, but in order to do so, they withdrew the amount they had initially deposited into our account (despite being the wrong amount, it was the bulk of it). One would think fixing the error, would simply require an adjustment for the shortfall…not so. They had promised us our monies would be available for our use when we needed them, but that didn’t happen. We were so stressed…

More than six weeks had passed and we still had no access to our money. It was now Thanksgiving. I decided I could not go on like this feeling so troubled. I made a list of all the things I was grateful for. I praised God for all his blessings. I made a second list of the goals we had hoped to accomplish while on vacation, and realized they were happening; the vehicle acquisition had not run smoothly, but we still acquired it. I made the decision to fully RELEASE this burden to God! I verbalized my trust in Him. In the midst of this complication, I placed my faith in Him. As I praised Him, I kept hearing the Holy Spirit telling me to read James. 

The New King James Version, James 1:2-4 & 2:6 & 2:12

“My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials. Knowing that the testing of your faith, produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.”

“But let him ask in faith, with no doubting…”

“Blessed is the man who endures temptation; for when he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him.”

Tears rolled down my cheeks; I felt so humbled and loved, knowing that God cared so much for us that He spoke so directly to our situation. This unresolved financial matter over-shadowed our whole trip, but now I slept well, I had peace and joy. Resolution occurred December 27.

Custodia V.

On June 5, 2014 Ann Voscamp wrote another excellent blog post. http://www.aholyexperience.com/ At the end of it she has a link to scriptures from the book of John which can be printed off to memorize. https://s3.amazonaws.com/a.voskamp/BlogFiles/theJesusProject(LARGE)MEMORYPRINTS.pdf

 It took me a few days before I sat down and read through everything; along with the scripture verses. Her challenge for herself and others is to memorize scripture. This quote jumped off the Memory Print page and I think each one of us needs to wrestle with the answer to the question.

"Christ's weapon against Satan in the desert was memorized scripture. And if you aren't memorizing scripture -- what IS your weapon in your battle?"

Good question isn't it?!

John 10:10 says, "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."

Let's take up the challenge and memorize scripture so we are ready for the next battle!

Jo-Ann P.

Living the Image

One of my favourite hobbies is photography - the challenge of capturing a moment in just the right way really appeals to me. It really is true that a picture is worth a thousand words, and then some; images often articulate what mere verbal descriptions fail to achieve.

The Bible says that God created us in His image - Genesis 1:27. I don't know about you, but I find that so reassuring. No matter what happens in life, or how I feel, I know I possess a kinship with my Creator that can never be taken away! And just like pictures can be incredibly creative portrayals of everyday things and can tell moving personal stories, so are each one of us purposefully designed to reflect our Creator in a profound way. Yet what I find even more incredible is how our great God, our Source, our Photographer, composes each of us in a different angle, light, and focus in order to reveal His same image. Amazing!

Images need angles. Isn't it true that just by changing the angle of the camera towards the object, the whole picture can change? The holiness of God required a payment to be made for our sin, and Jesus' death paid that debt in full. Now "we have been sanctified through the offering of the body of Jesus Christ once for all" (Hebrews 10:10). We can live in communion with God and experience His grace, all because God now sees us through the angle of the cross. And because of His grace, our own perspective of ourselves and our lives can be dramatically changed!

Images need light. You can't have a picture without it. The interaction of light and resulting shadow gives a photo its depth. Matthew 5:14,16 says "you are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven." We all go through times of darkness and doubt, but it's so important to remember our Light Source. Only then do the tough times act like a shadow, giving our lives depth of character.

Images need a focus. Some of the neatest photos I've seen are composed with some of the picture out of focus, with one object in focus. The effect is incredible as the Photographer clearly defines what He wants the picture to be about. We all know the importance of faith and trusting God when situations seem blurry; in fact the Bible says that "without faith it is impossible to please God" (Hebrews 11:6). If we can learn to appreciate the fuzzy parts of life that require the most faith to walk though, then we will be blown away as we behold the incredible beauty of that Image once it becomes clear. We simply need to focus on Him.

Since becoming an amateur photographer, the biggest challenge of photography that I have come across is trying to capture a moving object - it's really hard to get a sharp picture unless you have a steady hand and lots of skill. That's a good reminder to us that being still will reveal more of God's image in us than being busy. We all have times when we need to be busy, but too much often speaks 'look at me, see what I can do', while stillness says 'Look at Him, see His image in me.'

Ruth-Ellen W.

Neglected Dwelling

Each May long weekend, our family packs up to go to the cabin.  It is a much-anticipated weekend as our cabin is not winterized and is uninhabited for 6 months. When we pull onto the road leading to the cabin, there is a collective cheer from the children. My husband and I feel differently…we walk up the steps and turn the key with trepidation, murmuring “no whammies, no whammies”. We are hoping for no rodents, no burst water pipes and no water damage from a leaky roof. We aren’t characteristically such Debbie Downers but since these things have actually happened in previous years, you come to expect the worst! These things tend to ensue when your cabin is neglected over a long, cold Manitoba winter.

The good news is that this year none of the previously mentioned annoyances occurred! What we opened the door to find was a dark, dusty, cold, cobweb-filled cabin. I immediately drew the blinds and opened the windows to let fresh air and sunshine in. We turned on the heat to cut the chill. I got to work dusting and sweeping and making beds. I (very hesitantly!) got rid of the cobwebs. The cabin was transformed back into a place of life and warmth. A place where joy and relaxation set in…friends and family gather…meals are shared and games are played…s’mores and bonfires are enjoyed.

It made me think about a quote I recently read from St. Augustine that says:

O Holy Spirit, descend plentifully into my heart.  Enlighten the corners

of this neglected dwelling and scatter there Thy cheerful beams.

If I think about my heart/soul like the cabin left neglected over the winter then I realize that it needs to be cared for. If ignored, the icy chill of hurt and bitterness settles in and the blinds are closed to shut out people who might potentially hurt me. When the cutting wind of wintery circumstances is constantly battering my heart, it is left grey…dark…bleak. In those moments, I need the warmth and light of God’s mercy and grace to fill up the cold, dark places so there is no room for selfishness or anger or hopelessness. To be left only with a heart made available to God that is filled with a surplus of love, joy and peace that spills out to those around me is my desire. 

Make St. Augustine’s prayer your own.

Brenda E. 

Our Unchanging God

We live in a throw-away society - people would rather make a change for something new than put work into maintaining what they already have. Advertising, media and technology have brainwashed us into believing that 'off with the old, on with the new' is the happiest, most efficient way to live. It's an especially poisonous philosophy when people apply it to their relationships and their faith. As soon as problems arise, many are quick to question their commitments and turn their backs on God, believing that any change they pursue will doubtless lead to improvement and greater happiness. No wonder then, with so much change going on around us constantly, it can be incredibly difficult to fathom a God who is unchanging. Psalm 102:25-27 says "of old You laid the foundation of the earth, and the heavens are the work of Your hands. They will perish, but You will endure; yes, they will all grow old like a garment; like a cloak You will change them, and they will be changed. But You are the same, and Your years will have no end." Wow... how do we love, and inspire others to love, such an eternal Being as that? With so many new ideas coming at us all the time, and knowing that people embrace them believing they have as much validity as the values that society has held for centuries, how do we as Christians sort through it all in order to demonstrate a timeless message in a timely way? 

Here are a few thoughts I have:

Remember that God sees the beginning, the middle and the end. He knows each of us inside out and can see the best path for us to take! People are often reluctant to give up control until they come to a place that is beyond their control. Psalm 33:11 says "the counsel of the Lord stands forever, the plans of His heart to all generations." There is great comfort in reflecting on the fact that God was there at your birth, already knows tomorrow and therefore asks for you to trust Him today.

Understand the difference between change and improvement. Improvement always involves change, but change isn't always improvement. Adam and Eve first sinned because they desired knowledge more than obedience to God, and that thirst for societal 'improvement' apart from God continues to this day. A perfect, unchanging God has given us rules to govern our lives by, and we must choose to maintain that moral compass in order to properly discern what 'improvement' truly looks like. The story of the prodigal son can be found in Luke 15:11-24. The younger son didn't know how good he had it until he lost it all; he didn't realize that 'change' could be bad. God often allows us to rebel and go our own way in order to help us see the value of the life we had with Him.  He then patiently waits for us to return.

Put a higher value on preventative maintenance. Something of enduring value, whether it is a relationship, the environment, or your health, needs to be cared for or else it will disintegrate. It can't be treated like an iPad; you can't upgrade when your old one burns out. God has given us the task of stewardship - so how much time are we investing in the cultivation of what's most important? May God give us the wisdom we need to fulfill this high calling in spite of what society says. After all, buying into the throw-away mindset only means that in the end, you'll have nothing left to throw away.

"Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever." Hebrews 13:8

Ruth-Ellen W.

Saturday

Saturday. What comes to mind? A day off? A day to catch up on chores? Shopping? Relaxing? Family Day?

I recently read John Ortberg’s “Who Is This Man?” In this he devoted an entire chapter to Saturday. A specific Saturday.

I had never thought about this particular Saturday before . . . the Saturday between the crucifixion and the resurrection.

What would you have done if you had been there on that Saturday? Questioned . . . Waited . . . For what? The disciples and other followers of Jesus didn’t know Sunday was coming.

After all the events of the hours that passed before Saturday . . . the Passover meal . . . the foot washing . . . praying in the garden . . . sleeping in the garden . . . soldiers . . . denial . . . the trial . . . the mob . . . “Crucify Him, Crucify Him!” . . . the whip . . . the crown of thorns . . . heart pounding fear . . . heart breaking loss . . . and then He said, “It is finished”. Did the followers feel that they too were done?

Even the women heading to the tomb Sunday morning did not anticipate seeing the risen Christ . . . they were heading there to care for a body . . .

But . . . THAT Sunday morning, EVERYTHING changed . . . for them . . . for us.

Because of that Sunday morning, our Saturdays are also forever changed.

Make no mistake about it, we still have Saturdays . . . those days after . . .

The day after the heart stopping fearful diagnosis . . . The day after the loss . . . The day after the door slams and your son is gone to who knows where . . .The day your daughter does not call . . .

The day after . . . Saturday . . . When heaven seems silent and you don’t know which way to turn . . .

Saturday . . . When hope is gone and prayer seems futile . . . When you don’t even know what to pray. . .

But . . . here’s our advantage. We KNOW about Sunday! Though we will have moments of despair . . . and days when the stuff of life seems overwhelming . . . we do not need to stay there. Sunday happened and we are forever changed by that reality!

“‘Don’t be alarmed’ he said’ you are looking for Jesus the Nazarene who was crucified. HE HAS RISEN!’” (Mark 16:6a)

Hope for every “Saturday”!

HE HAS RISEN!

Ruth U.